I think I sold my freedom of time
It is what it is.
Hello guys, I’m happy that finally I dare to go back to telling stories with you guys. A year ago, I was very happy to see your response that was so positive and I never thought that many of you also relate to what I experienced in going through the phase of making peace with loneliness.
Honestly, I’ve never had that many responses in my life, and this makes me a bit pressure enough to go back to talk about what I’ve been through over the past year. But trust me, guys. I’m still writing, I just don’t dare to publish.
So, what have I experienced over the past year?
I reflect a lot about the work system that I have been in for seven years. No, I don’t hate the company I worked for before, I really enjoyed it, it’s just about what I’ve been thinking lately, is about Freedom of Time.
I thought about this when I was watching the anime entitled ‘Attack Of Titan’ where the main character was fighting for freedom for himself and the people he loved as a human being with all his rights, until he made himself a slave to freedom.
I realized about how expensive the guarantees I gave to the company, which were about the freedom of time. It turns out that working with other people is not only selling skills, but also the time I have. I used to work for 12 hours every day and only got a day off in a month. I’ve also worked for 8 hours for 6 days, Sundays off, public holidays still go to work.
What I mean by freedom of time is the difficulty of asking for time off. For example I want to do personal needs — outside of office matters, I have to ask for permission in advance and have to give logical reasons that can be accepted by them, this makes me very stressed. Even when I was sick I had to show a certificate from the hospital and the results of the thermometer listed. Salary? Don’t worry, keep it cut. What a tragedy.
In fact, if we only sell skills, the output that the company actually asks for is the final result of our work, if it’s finished, we get wages.
But that’s the reality that I lived for seven years of my career and without realizing it I have sold the freedom of my time, and it’s very expensive.
But this all comes back to the decision that I have been through all this time, the reason I accepted the offer is because I need it, I decided to accept such a situation so I also have to accept the consequences. Because at that time I hadn’t thought about it so far.
From this incident, I can prove that the words we often hear about “time is money” are really real. As simple as we wake up late, catch the bus late, come to the office late, and ended up with our money has to be cut.
What Now?
I pulled myself back to evaluate and ask myself what I really want now? Ironically, I was reminded of the words of the famous French philosopher, Albert Camus.
Humans want to find the meaning of their lives, but when asked in more detail, ‘what are you looking for?’ He was confused to answer it. Especially if asked “how to search?” Or “what size has it been found that you were looking for?” Must be even more confused.
And that’s what describes how I feel right now. When we met reality, the concepts we build often have exceptions. In fact, even Eren — main character of Attack Of Titan till death he did not get his freedom, and his friends were still struggling to fight with other nations. And what I’m underlining is that they never give up on their circumstances. They continue to fight for the good of their lives in the future. It is what it is.
“acceptance without resignation” as the; way of dealing with the recognition of absurdity, asking whether or not man can live without appeal while defining a conscious revolt against the avoidance of absurdity of the world. — Albert Camus
I decided to quit my job and try to work again to find a better place. Thankfully, If I can work independently.
And the question is what freedom are you fighting for?
Thank you,
Feel free to share your thoughts!
TATAKAE!
